Send in the clowns

Well here we are again. Well done people, you’ve traversed another year. Whatever you’ve been through this year, the ups, the downs, the wibbles, you’ve been awesome. You’ve hung in there and here you are now reading about my own little adventure new years eve.

I went out today to run some errands. It made me realise how long it’s been since I drove myself into town for a physio’. I was actually a bit nervous about going so far from the house on my own with no-one to meet there ‘just in case’. But it was a successful trip. The festive market has gone so there’s more pedestrian space, and the multitude of shoppers has thinned back down to a more usual amount so I didn’t have to wait in any long queues, hurrah!

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Christmas lights

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I bought some Christmas cards for next year (I know, organised eh?! hehe), a notebook for my upcoming free online course on medical neuroscience and some beer for Magic Dude to swig at midnight tonight to see in the new year with me. But I also grabbed some unexpected additions: some cute lights to hang from the mantle piece and a reindeer decoration for the Christmas tree. Oh, and obviously I needed a Batman biro with multiple colour options. And a glittery travel mug. Obviously. 😉

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New Years Eve buying

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Living with chronic illness does tend to be a bit of a circus at times so new years eve is often pretty hard for many of my fellow patients out there. We tend to find the laughs, silliness and smiles where we can but some times are harder than others. Which is why I want to share this…. I fell about laughing when I finally saw this following little ditty last night which may become my theme tune for 2015….

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Imagine leaving a doctors appointment where we’ve seen a practitioner particularly lacking in knowledge specific to our conditions – what a circus. What better to cheer us up than to sing quietly to ourselves as we leave…”dah-dah-daddle-uh-da-dah-dah Circus…”! By the time I get to the bit about polka-dots I expect I’ll be chuckling. We’re stronger than we think.

Sending best wishes for the new year to you all,

Love from me

x

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P.S. Here’s a version in multiple languages. Just because. 😉

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Sparkling determinedly for the New Year

Why hello there! Fancy meeting you this New Year’s Eve, come in, come in. And please excuse the sparkles! 😉

Christmas with Magic Dude’s folks was lovely. Okay,yes it’s true that I sat with my trusty hot water bottle most of the time, with my feet up on the footstool. And yep, it’s also true that I drank more fluids in one day than I can comprehend (pretty much equivalent to putting me on a rooibos tea drip)! And I admit that I tended to nod and pretend I understood what people were saying when I had no clue coz the multiple conversations had taken it’s toll and squashed any remaining ability to process information (unless someone said “Tea?” then the answer was easy)! And of course I thought of my missing family, but the choices of others are the choices of others. We need to hold onto who we are despite the losses and misunderstandings.

Part of who I am is the girl who always dressed up at christmas because, well, why not? I didn’t get to any other time and it felt nice to dress up. And this year I decided to have a giggle trying to make my fingernails look a bit festive. I was going for christmas trees and a snowman…

2013 Xmas nails 1

Yes, I do also paint the skin around my fingernails! It’s just easier that way!

2013 Xmas nails 2

Some bits of masking tape to leave a triangular shape to create the christmas three shape..

Christmas tree shapes, snowman shape with white nail varnish freehand (just blobbed two circular shapes!)...

Christmas tree shapes, snowman shape with white nail varnish freehand (just blobbed two circular shapes!)…

2013 Xmas nails 4

Ta-daaaaah!

Of course that was my left hand… painted by my dominant right hand.

How do you think the snowman turned out when I had to paint the other one with my useless left hand? 😉

Like this…

2013 Xmas nails 5

Haahahahaaa! It was looking kinda good up until that point, eh?!

(S’cuse the chip, I forgot to take a piccy of the comedy snowman til after christmas)!

I tried to paint on some eyes and buttons but I just got big blobs of paint everywhere, then I tried to wipe them off and… well… snowman-in-the-fog anyone?! Or Magic Dude said it might be a vomiting-snowman? Feel free to add whatever twist you feels fits the, er, artwork! 😉

So, here I am on New Year’s Eve and I’m gonna keep it simple tonight – sparkles will do the trick.

Of course I can’t go anywhere tonight, so I’ll be sat on my sofa with Magic Dude and our Local Friend. Am I ready? I’m so exhausted, and fainty, and nauseated, and… Bah! I’m gonna do New Years Eve from my sofa and it’s gonna be sparkly despite all that.

Checklist:

– One ballgown (yes, ballgown. <pulls a determined face> ! )
– Sparkly nails that don’t exactly go with the dress because I’m such a rebel!
– Christmassy headgear
– Party hats on standby
– Non-alcoholic mulled apple juice for me
– Warm fluffy blanket
– Hot Water Bottle
– Random christmas nibbles
– DVDs to choose from already by the telly

Sorted!

So let’s have a moment in our own homes where we pat ourselves on the back for getting through last year, for smiling and laughing despite the downsides, for making friends online who understand, for finding the ‘me’ in each of us that the health stuff never reaches. You are beautiful. You are strong. And even if your nails aren’t sparkly tonight, your soul certainly is. Sparkle my friends, I will be thinking of you all tonight and wishing you well.

Much love from me to each and every one of you,

x

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A jar of joy!

I’ve seen a suggestion flitting about on the social networks about noting down the good things in a slightly different way than we might usually think of, and I think it’s a great idea so I decided that I would follow the suggestion myself.

The suggestion begins with you re-using an old jar by giving it a new purpose for 2013….

I have a jam jar that I attempted my first ever glass painting on years ago, so it’s really messily done, but it’s still with me so rather than it being a jar-of-random-stuff-coz-I-don’t-know-where-else-to-put-them it has been reassigned to the job of my 2013 Jar of Joys! Of course, we could use any container we like, I think it adds a little something more if the container is pretty or meaningful in some way although, on the other hand, a fresh start with something new is also very meaningful and adds to the cause, too.

My Jar of Joy at the beginning of 2013

My Jar of Joy at the beginning of 2013

Then….

The idea is that whenever a good thing happens in 2013 we write a note of it (little bits of different coloured or patterned paper would be really pretty) and pop the notes into the jar. At the end of 2013 we have a jar of reminders of all the good things that it’s so easy to forget or not give it the importance it deserves in our memory. For those of us living with health conditions, or any other challenging life anomaly, this could be really beneficial to our satisfaction at the end of 2013 and looking ahead to 2014. Many of us have experienced the mixed emotions at the end of one dastardly tough year and trying to feel like it was worth it and that the new year will somehow be better. It is easy to remember the hardships, especially when they’re reinforced in our memories by occurring daily, so it’s even more important to remind ourselves of the little joys that so easily get lost along the way, x

From an ill health perspective ‘good things’ would mean slightly different things than perhaps a rock band roadie or NASA scientist might imagine 😉 If we manage a physio’ session with less pain, clean the bathroom and still have enough juice left to make ourselves a congratulatory cup of tea, if a good friend comes to visit and lighten our day, if we have a meal with family, or get to visit a library or museum  or see a film or play, If we dress ourselves without as much pain as usual, or put on an item of clothing that we couldn’t put on ourselves for a long time, any of these things and more are experiences and achievements to allow ourselves a moment smiling and a warmth in our hearts, and if they make you grin then they deserve to get jotted down and added to the jar. Think about what will make you smile when you look at them again at the end of the year, and those are the ones to note down.

I’ve started mine.So far there is note in there about one of my best buds coming round on New Year’s Eve to natter, make christmas Lego and pull crackers 🙂 And a note about Magic Dude taking me to the cinema on a date. (Yes, we live in the same house, but dates are great ways to treat yourselves to some couple time instead of worrying about bills or who’s going to do the dishes)! Oh yes, and one about sculpting in the snow with the nieces, too 🙂

I kept a couple of party hats that came out of christmas crackers which I’m currently using as my note paper for the jar!

christmas hats for the jar of joy

I have a tendency to keep things, I’m a sentimental 😉 So last year I kept scraps of memories in the form of things like cinema tickets and birthday cards, but this Jar of Joys allows me to note down moments that warmed my heart and made me smile as well. These are the moments that lift us, and make us feel all warm on the inside. So I reckon collecting them is no bad thing, and getting to read them during the next tricky transition from 2013 to 2014 seems ideal to me. I shall keep jotting down joys and see what I end up with at the end of the year 😀

x

Happy New Yeeeaaar!

To you all from me, thank-you so much for visiting, commenting, and letting me know that you’ve found the info’ on this weblog useful. It means so very much to me to be able to share information and experiences with you. I have not been able to write much recently but after March you may well notice an increase in blog posts as dissertation writing will no longer have a call on my sparse brain time!

Creating and writing this blog has been an amazing experience for me. Both from the point of view of sharing info’ with fellow patients, and getting more comfortable about posting my words out in the wider world. This website is my virtual home, the hub from which I branch out and explore. This website says so much about me, but there’s more silliness, more information, more chat and pondering to come. I’m looking forward to 2013’s blogging experience and the 1st birthday of the blog at the end of January. Next year is looking exciting from where I’m sitting (under a blanket with a hot water bottle 😉 ).

Oh yes and whilst sporting some rather sparkly celebratory nail varnish!

Oh yes and whilst sporting some rather sparkly celebratory nail varnish!

So here I am raising my metaphorical glass to say cheers to you all. May you have a bright and shiny 2013 with smiles and magic moments to get you through the bumpier times, and as much tea as a person could wish for! 😉

Love and bestest wishes from me,

x